An Ode to My Sister Tamsen

During one of my roughest days after my first chemo treatment I got a phone call from Tamsen. I say it was the worst time for her to call but she says it was the best time that she could have called, I am grateful she called and helped me through it.

About a week after that she called to say she was coming out for my next treatment. She sacrificed - she left her husband for 10 days, she travelled alone with two small children (Aiden 2 1/2 and Abby 12 weeks), she gave up her son for a whole week having only ever been parted from him for 2 days for what? She cooked, she cleaned, she grocery shopped, she took kids to school, she picked kids up from school, she did laundry, etc.

Unfortunately I don't remember a lot of the first five days but I certainly have a lot of memories of the last five! It's been a very long time since we last hung out and I have to say I forgot what I was missing out on.....we talked about everything food, kids, husbands, life, food, family, schooling, food, dreams, desires, school, food and yes did I mention food?! Not only is she is an amazing cook but ALSO an amazing person!!!!

Thank you Tamsen for coming and taking such good care of us. Thank you John for giving up your family and living in such a quiet house. Thank you to Randy & Julie Keyes and Doug & Elaine Streibel for making it possible.

I found the following Ode that I felt represented Tamsen better than I could ever put it.

An Ode to Sister

My sister.
More beautiful than
The brilliant colors of
Autumn's leaves
Gracefully floating through soft breeze
On a warm afternoon.

My sister.
As precious as a glistening gemstone
Mounted within the highest karats of gold.

My sister.
A woman of substance
Character
Nobility-
The personification of royalty.

My sister.
The reflection of elegance
Style
Grace
And charm.

My sister.
One whom I love
For the uniqueness-
Harmony and warmth
That only she can bring.

My sister.
As you celebrate each special day,
Just know that I cherish
Every moment that you have been
A part of my life
And I love you for all that you are--
Just you.
My sister.

© Copyright Annie Ruth

Spectacular!!!

My sister Tricia had originally asked me to shave her head and I just couldn't do it, she thought it would be therapeutic but yeah NO! So instead she went BIG and decided to raise some money for Breast Cancer.......she had a competition going between all her stores, whichever one raised the most funds could shave her head. WOW and REALLY?!!!

For a month these stores madly came up with some ingenious ways to raise the 'most' funds and in the end her Courtenay store got to do the honors!



Drum roll everyone........in total her stores made $600 and the company she works for kindly matched that for a GRAND TOTAL of $1200!!!!! Thank you Tricia for being so bold, thank you to all those that raised the money and a huge thank you to First Choice Haircutters for matching those donations! It truly was a SPECTACULAR DAY!!!!!

Tears to My Eyes

I have the best children ever! Adrianna is loving but very reserved in expression and emotion very much like me and somewhat like her father. Eli on the other hand is our dramatic, sensitive, expressive and emotional one.

Yesterday I sent them off to school knowing I wouldn't see them again until Monday afternoon while I under went the 2nd chemo treatment. This is where the tears come in.....

Probably a good hour before having to take Eli to school he came up to me with a big hug and said, "I want to give you a big hug because I won't see you and you have to go to the hospital, try and have fun there mom." Okay so I classify that more as funny than tearful! However, it doesn't stop there. He pointed to a couple pictures he had made for me last week and said, "When you need to mom look at my pictures and remember when you see my name E-L-I that I am saying I love you." Now that is why I have tears in my eyes!!!



As I said Adrianna isn't as expressive but is in her own way. As she gets older hers tend to be in writing, she'll all of a sudden hand me a note, smile and walk away. This is what happened a few weeks back. On this last note it simply read 'I hope you get well soon mom, I love you". Again tears in my eyes!!!


I couldn't help but upload these precious keepsakes for all to see just how wonderful of a reminder I have around my house of how much my children care even when I can't physically see or hear them.

I'm Pumped!!!

Probably about 5 days into my first chemo treatment I was in really really rough shape and my sister Nikki brought up The Weekend to End Breast Cancer I didn't know much about it at the time but I certainly do now and I AM PUMPED!

When my sister Tricia told me she was going to shave her head and raise money I was speechless but then I started thinking what am I doing? Yes I'm going through it but how can I bring awareness and be pro active about it (other then walking around chestless and bald)? Well Nikki helped me figure that out and I have the best finale planned to this saga...... watch out 2008! After speaking with my other two sisters Tricia and Tamsen it was clear we're all in! I'm PUMPED, get it yet?!

The reason for this entry? We have been discussing team names and well lets just say that I'm horrible at coming up with slogans. Thankfully my sister Nikki, my adorable niece Kaya and my husband Les have come up with some team names which I've listed below. So why again am I writing this? This is where you come in maybe you can add to our growing list or tell me which is your favourite or not. We're just wanting to have fun with it.........

Kaya's team name: a bunch of boobies

Nikki's team names: breast friends forever (BFF for short), put your breast foot forward, all for one, bust-to-move, finish line or "bust", bustin' out

Les's team names: boobalicious, perky & pink, carcinoma counsins, saline sisters

After getting all excited about the 'perfect' team name it hit me......a team name shouldn't be the worry but that 60 km walk! YIPES! I need to start training and NOW....wait a minute maybe I should get through chemo and radiation before I go hard core?!

The best way to describe my excitment about this new adventure is that I'M PUMPED!!!!!

The analogy of a six year old

There are times I'd really like to be in the brain of a six year old or at least my six year old!!

This morning we were walking Adrianna to school and one of the yards we passed had the edges of its yard dug up so there was a line of dirt on the sidewalk. Eli asked me why the yard was dug up and it was obvious that they were getting ready to put an underground sprinkler system in so I explained that to him. His response back was, "so they dug the hole up then they'll put the thingy in and and bury it like a dead person". My 34 year old brain never would have thought of that!

It gets even better. Eli has a classmate over right now and on our way home from school I explained that it's very important that once we get in the house and take our shoes off we have to wash our hands. While in the bathroom lined up to wash our hands Eli's friend Emily questioned me as to why and I explained that we need to make sure we get all the germs off our hands and her response was, "so we have to get all the dirt from the monkey bars off our hands or like if someone put snot on it or something and it got on us". Yeah sure!!

Oh to be a six year old!!

It's Done

At my chemo orientation I was told what signs to watch out for.....sensitive scalp, hurt, sore, pain, etc. At my first chemo treatment my nurse told me that my hair would be falling out because I'm being given high doses of meds but that all I might experience is some thinning before my next appointment (July 13). Well, off and on over the past week and a half I've experienced some scalp sensitivity but it really didn't become constant until the beginning of the week. I would especially notice it at night because it sometimes felt like I was laying on pins and needles.

On Thursday it started, I could pull on my hair and a little bit would come out and then Friday came along and it REALLY started falling out! I could run my hands through my hair and not much would come out but if I grabbed one of my curls I wouldn't have to pull much and yep you guessed it out it came. So it became a question of when to shave it? I knew it had to happen but when I wasn't 100% sure, I just couldn't bring myself to do it......yet. It wasn't so much the worry of having no hair heck I just went from being very large chested to completely flat chested, if I could do that what's a head of hair?!

Today I hopped into the shower not really thinking too much of it when it started. Hand full after hand full after hand full it was coming out. I kept thinking to myself - stop but I couldn't it became an empowerment thing. Why shouldn't I just naturally let it come out? Sure one might say your nuts or how could you but how couldn't I? I didn't want to be scared and jump the gun and just shave it all. I finally realized at that moment I wanted to experience the hair loss, to know that this is just one of many side affects I've experienced from the chemo drugs and like the rest I could manage it and get through it. It wasn't until I was getting out of the shower that I wondered what I looked like, how thin was it, was it going to be patchy? Oh, well it was done and it was time to face the music.

Two weeks since my first chemo injection and I can say I'm bald (almost bald) and beautiful! Adrianna helped, Eli laughed and laughed and laughed and Les gave compliments. PLUS my sister Nikki had hers shaved at the exact same time which actually almost made it fun!

Regrets? No way, I wouldn't have done it any other way.

WOW!

I've always known that I have a huge support system but of late it has amazed me!

My good friend Vivian shaved her head June 25th in support of me and those in her life that have also been affected by cancer. Do you think it ends there? NO. My sister Tricia will be shaving her head on July 21st also in support of my soon to be baldness but does it end there? NO. My sister-in-law Nikki will also be shaving her head when I finally decide that I REALLY must do it which in all honesty is very very soon.

These three women have been a great inspiration, would I have done it for them? I honestly don't know the answer but I'm honored that they want to be apart of this journey with me. On top of it all I've recently realized how amazing my siblings are. They have been an incredible support system all on their own. They have or will be stepping in and putting their lives on hold with no hesitation. I am truly speechless and honored to have them as siblings.

Of course, I can't stop here. There are so many other amazing people. All the meals, child minding, house cleaning and the list goes on.... all I can say is WOW!